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YAY! My very first blog entry! HOORAH!!
Just to kind of give you an idea of what’s goin on in my life… I’m gonna start off by giving you two words:
OH CRAP.
I’m finding myself in a rather sticky situation with someone who I hold very dear too my heart, seeing that he’s a good friend of mine, and I know I can trust him with anything, and I can tell him EVERYTHING… And I never once even thought that my hart would flip over twice when i would look at him… dear blog, my dilemma is this:
I am in love with my best friend.
And i have no idea what to do. He broke up with his girlfriend not even a month ago, (Luckily it had nothing to do with me)… I’ve known him for something like 10months, we did service year together, and it actually feels like i’ve known him for my whole life. We’ve laughed together, cried together, all that jazz. At one stage he started seeing me as a guy with long hair (or so i thought). We’ve been spending an awefull lot of time together the last 2, 3 months… Every second night, we’d just lie beneath the stars and talk. I’ve gotten to know his heart, learned what makes him tick. I’d learned to love him, inspite of his mistakes. BUT I didn’t love him in THAT way, you know?
Today’s Sunday… Thursday night was the last night we could just be together, and i looked forward to just chatting the night away with my dear amigo. We just lied beneath the stars till something like 2am… something happened that night, that i’m not even sure i understand (no, he didn’t kiss me or anything, in fact it was kinda the opposite of that) As i was lying there, next to my dear friend, i realized that he would be taking a huge chunk of my heart with him when he gets into his car the following day…
He didn’t know that I’d fallen in love with him that week. I tried to deny it with every fibre of my being. I tried to hide the fact that my heart flipped over twice when i saw him… Everytime he hugged me, I had to force myself to let go. I would catch myself smiling whenever I thought of him. Everytime he’d look into my eyes, my knees would go weak, and something inside me would just wish he’d see it……. and kiss me.
Now… Here’s the REAL dillemma: Two days ago, the day we said our goodbye’s… he confessed to me that he’s actually crazy about me, and he’s been feeling like that for the last 5 months. (AAAAH!!)
SO… WHAT THE FAH AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
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